Family Estrangement: 20 Sad Reasons Why Kids Are Cutting Off Their Parents
Family Isn't Always Forever
We'd like to believe we live in a world where all families are perfect and stay together till the very end, but that's simply not true. From divorce to abuse and stubbornness, there are many reasons why kids and parents suffer from broken relationships. In today's world, this is growing more and more rampant among younger generations, but why? Here are 20 sad reasons as to why kids are cutting off their parents more and more.
1. No Support
Some kids simply feel like their parents aren't there to back them up when they need it. It's not just about all those missed recitals, school performances, and soccer games, it's about feeling like they don't support your decisions and choices as an individual. If they're only going to create problems for you, why keep that relationship?
2. Constant Criticism
Does it ever feel like your parents always have something harsh to say to you? Whether it's about your job choices, your school performance, or even something as small as how you do your laundry, if all you ever get are mean words meant to hurt you, it won't make you want to stay. It can make you feel as if they don't respect you as a person.
3. A Big Argument
Sometimes all it takes is a big argument to break down the relationship. For some people, experiencing a huge fight with a loved one is enough for them to break all ties. Unfortunately, it doesn't matter whether or not they want to make up, if they're done, they're done. End of story.
4. Stubbornness
And while most arguments can usually come to a resolution, stubbornness and pride play a large part in whether kids and their parents decide to make up. If you refuse to believe that you're wrong and shiver at the thought of having to say sorry, you're going to have to pay the price for it. Oftentimes, peoples' pride ruins more family relationships than you'd think.
5. Physical Abuse
Not every problem can be so easily fixed, and one understandable reason for estrangement is physical abuse. It is so important that every person feels comfortable and safe in their own home, so if that's ever broken in any way, you should always look to leave. Sometimes cutting off your parents isn't a want, it's a need.
6. Emotional Abuse
Not all scars come from physical abuse -- some are emotional too. Whether it's through verbal remarks or threats, emotional abuse can come in many different forms, all of which are damaging for your mental health. Being in such a toxic environment is too much for anyone. It makes sense why any kid would want to leave.
7. Too Much Interference
Even after moving out of their house, if you find your parents are constantly trying to intervene and tell you what to do, it can feel incredibly burdensome. Not only are they not letting you live your own life, they don't have any respect for your boundaries.
8. Focusing Too Much On Independence
Over here in the West, the younger generation has a much more different perspective of adulthood compared to Asian countries or even older generations. Nowadays, it's all about finding your own path and gaining independence. Some get so lost in that, they forget to include their family in their life moving forward. It's freedom, but at what cost?
9. Differing Values
Feeling like you can't connect with your parents on important values and morals can slowly lead to a breakdown in the relationship. If these differing opinions start to cause fights because you both disagree about marriage or the way you lead your life, it doesn't give you much reason to stay.
10. Brings Back Sad Memories
For some individuals, losing a parent can be the hardest thing they ever go through. As a result, seeing the other parent might bring back a lot of sad and unwanted memories that are too hard to bear. While it's not exactly fair for the mother or father, it's a means of self-preservation. What you can't see can't hurt you.
11. High Expectations
Are you always falling short of your parent's expectations? From not making enough money to not being married yet, if all they do is harp on you for failing to succeed in their eyes, it just makes every visit miserable. Sooner or later, those meetings just slowly come to a stop.
12. Rejecting Your Partner
Marriage can be a touchy subject for certain families. While some parents are carefree and let their kids choose whoever makes them happy, some want to have their say in who they end up with. For these parents who end up rejecting their children's partners, be prepared to lose them. All you're doing is putting them in a position where they have to choose one or the other.
13. No Time
Not every reason is going to be so dark; at the end of the day, everyone is living their own lives and might just not have the time for reconnecting. For those who are especially focused on their own growth and career, they may be willing to sacrifice certain parts of their life for success. Unfortunately, family is included on that list.
14. Long Distance
In today's day and age, no one is confined to living out the rest of their lives where they grew up. Some children decide to fly away from the nest to other countries as they settle down with their partners or on their own. If so, it's all the more difficult maintaining relationships with parents when there's so much distance between the two. Obviously, video-calling can make a big difference, but it's up to the kids and parents on how much effort they put into that.
15. Generational Gap
Whether their parents are too strict and traditional or simply refuse to see eye-to-eye, feeling that generational gap in extreme cases can be hard to get over, especially if there's no chance of reconciling. Having to follow outdated practices just because the parent doesn't want to change can be too frustrating to deal with.
16. Entitlement
Where are all the spoiled kids at? It's not always on the parent as to why relationships end. For some entitled brats who don't get what they want, they no longer see their parents as needed. It's a disappointing and sad attitude to have, but the thought that they "don't owe them anything," is a real one in this world.
17. Divorced Parents
Watching your parents divorce is a difficult experience for any child. As a result of it, many children end up with either the mother or father, and depending on how the breakup went, may never see the other.
18. Time To Heal
If your relationship with your parents wasn't a healthy one, stepping away from them is an opportunity to heal and grow on your own. It's important to remember that just because you're related by blood doesn't mean they're guaranteed to be good for you. For some kids, it's a matter of protecting themselves and moving forward.
19. Influenced By Others
Never underestimate the power of influence. Whether it's because of their partner, friends, or even society, some kids feel the pressure to step away from their parents because they're shaped to believe it's for the better. Sometimes people are sadly gaslit into believing their family relationships are more toxic than they actually are.
20. Not Being A Family Person
It may be hard to believe, but some kids just simply don't see the benefit or need of keeping parents around. It's different from focusing on independence where it's done accidentally, this one is done purposefully. Thinking that their parents have done their job and it's time for them to move on can lead to a forward way of thinking where they don't look back. Not even on the damages they're leaving behind.
