Forever Alone: 20 Reasons Dating Is A Struggle For Men Nowadays
You Better Shape Up
Dating today can feel like navigating a maze with no map, especially for men who suffer from isolation, mental health struggles, and confusion about their ever-changing roles. With this new-aged world of dating apps and non-traditional relationship dynamics, it's no surprise many men are left scratching their heads and wondering what happened to the good old days of just asking someone out. Here are 20 reasons dating is a struggle for men nowadays.
Photo by Andrea Piacquadio on Pexels
1. Changing Gender Roles
With women becoming increasingly independent, it's hard for men to know what's expected of them in dating contexts. What used to be an attractive masculine quality may now be looked at as an overly macho turn-off.
Photo by Tim Mossholder on Pexels
2. Trouble Navigating Boundaries
With movements like MeToo emphasizing consent, some men have anxiety about making a move or even attempting to approach a woman for fear of coming off creepy. Outdated rules have been torn down but new clear ones have yet to be established, causing confusion.
Photo by Shukhrat Umarov on Pexels
3. Toxic Masculinity
A lot of men still grapple with out of date beliefs about what it means to be "manly." As a result, they struggle with communication, intimacy, and connection.
Photo by Craig McLachlan on Unsplash
4. Online Dating
Online apps have changed dating culture to being more instant and impersonal. If before you'd meet someone by having an in-person conversation, now first impressions are based on a photo and profile. Ghosting and inconsistent communication are common on these platforms and often lead to frustration and burnout.
Photo by Flure Bunny on Unsplash
5. Career Pressures
With the increased competition in the job market nowadays, many men are having to prioritize their careers over their personal lives. This causes them to put dating on the backburner until they're more established which might prove to be too late.
Photo by Vitaly Gariev on Unsplash
6. Unable To Commit
Many men are unable to commit to a serious relationship because of the fear of getting hurt. With around half of couples ending in divorce, many people grow up with negative associations surrounding long-term relationships.
Photo by Sarah Cervantes on Unsplash
7. Isolation in Men
Increasing rates of loneliness, especially among young men, make it harder for them to put themselves out there and meet new people. Isolation can lead to hopelessness and anxiety which add difficulty when it comes to creating a good first impression.
Photo by Alexander Andrews on Unsplash
8. Unrealistic Expectations
With online dating vastly favoring women, some guys feel that girls have much too high expectations of them financially, emotionally, visually, and otherwise. This is enough to intimidate some men to the point of not even trying.
Photo by RDNE Stock project on Pexels
9. Insecurity
Social media scews perceptions of looks, making men feel undesireable if they don't look like a male model. In the dating sphere, influencer couples make dating life look perfect in an unattainable and discouraging way.
Photo by Ludovic Migneault on Unsplash
10. Financial Pressure
Even though societal expectations are changing, there are still a lot of old-fashioned notions in the dating world that women continue to subscribe to. This often includes the expectation for the man to cover the bill on dates, putting a lot of pressure on them if they're not yet financially stable.
11. Lack of Emotional Intelligence
Because of societal expectations that continue to shape men, guys are overwhelmingly weak at expressing themselves emotionally. This can stunt their ability to create meaningful and deep connections with women.
Photo by cottonbro studio on Pexels
12. Women's Independence
Decades ago, life's formula entailed women getting married and having kids. With more women entering the workforce and prioritizing their careers and freedom, this is no longer the case. Men may find women less receptive to long-term commitment and traditional roles like childbearing.
Photo by Anna Shvets on Pexels
13. Oversensitivity
Kids in the past few decades have more and more been the product of gentle parenting practices, making it harder for them to deal with difficult experiences like rejection. Their oversensitivity may dissuade them from engaging in any potentially triggering situation like asking someone out.
Photo by Budgeron Bach on Pexels
14. Too Much Choice
Before social media and dating apps, people would only meet by chance or through mutual friends. Now, the perceived abundance of options available to both men and women make it difficult for both sides to commit because they’re always wondering if there’s someone better.
Photo by Budgeron Bach on Pexels
15. Alpha Male Syndrome
In the dating world, alpha males are often at the top of the food chain. All the girls want to date the alpha and have little interest in the other available guys. This makes it hard for the betas, gammas, and deltas of the world to secure dates and destroys their confidence.
Photo by Diego F. Parra on Pexels
16. Rise of Non-monogamy
With women's independence came the downfall of the traditional relationship and the rise in popularity of hookup culture and non-monogamy. Although this may seem beneficial to guys, it actually just makes it worse when it comes to forming a committed relationship as many women vie for the same handful of guys.
Photo by cottonbro studio on Pexels
17. Trust Issues
If men have experienced deceit or witnessed people close to them who have, they may have trouble trusting their partner. This poses a real barrier to building a healthy foundation for a new relationship.
18. Mental Health
With more and more young people being diagnosed with depression and anxiety, many feel they don't have the emotional stability to commit to a relationship. Many men are prioritizing their mental health before they feel they can put themselves out there romantically.
Photo by Daniel Reche on Pexels
19. Loss of Autonomy
Many men have trouble with commitment because they think they would have to give up too much of their freedom. If they have a lifestyle built on personal choice, it might not seem worth is for them to give that up in exchange for a relationship.
Photo by Oliver Sjöström on Pexels
20. Negative Past Experiences
If a man has had negative dating experiences in the past, he might have little interest in trying to date again. Bad memories can be hard to get past.
