Marriage is the final plunge, as they say. While there’s no rush to jump into it, it can be hard to tell when you’re ready to make the leap and when you need to reassess. Here are 10 signs you’re ready to get married, and 10 signs that you’re not.
1. Shared Values and Goals
It’s important to be on the same page as your partner, and a strong alignment on goals and values is a telltale sign you’re ready to tie the knot. Mutual trust and a shared vision of the future will only help solidify your foundation.
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2. You Trust Them Completely
You’ll never get anywhere with your relationship if you don’t trust your partner. A good indicator of marriage material is when you can trust them entirely, knowing they’re a rock for you to lean on whenever you need them.
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3. Clear Communication
Openly communicating with your partner is the cornerstone of a solid relationship. A willingness to navigate challenges together will help you both grow stronger and is a good sign that you may be ready for that final step.
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4. You Share Responsibilities
Weaponized incompetence is an ever-growing phenomenon among couples, but when you both take equal responsibility in the relationship, you know you’re in a good place. Household chores, planning, and decision-making are two-way streets and foster a sense of equality.
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5. A Strong Intimate Connection
Emotional and physical intimacy is one of the keys to a healthy relationship. When you balance both of these with your partner, and trust the connection you have, it can be a strong indicator of marriage material.
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6. People Notice a Good Change
Since your relationship began, has anyone commented that you seem happier? That you’ve changed for the better? When those closest to you can spot a positive difference, it’s often a good sign that you’re with your forever person.
7. You’re Best Friends
Wedding bells could be in your future if you consider your partner your best friend. After all, what’s a partner if not someone you can share everything and grow alongside with?
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8. A Wedding is Just the Beginning
A wedding shouldn’t be the last thing on your mind! If you often daydream about what comes after the wedding, i.e. your marriage, it’s a good indication that you see this person beside you for the rest of your life.
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9. You Can Discuss Finances
Money is easily one of the biggest reasons couples get divorced. So, it’s a huge sign of trust if you have open and honest discussions about finances.
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10. Respectful Boundaries
A partner who understands and adheres to your boundaries is the kind of partner you want for life. If your partner doesn’t give you grief about your lines in the sand, you’re looking at a keeper.
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1. You’re Scared Of Commitment
If the idea of marriage raises the hair on your arms, you’re probably not ready for it. Sit down and be honest with yourself about whether marriage is something you see for yourself.
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2. Unresolved Baggage
We all have baggage we carry with us from previous relationships. But if yours impedes your current relationship, it doesn’t make sense to jump into a marriage.
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3. You Have Unrealistic Expectations
Much like having children, marriage is not the solution to every problem. If you and your partner have issues to resolve, do it realistically with better communication or even a therapist. Marriage isn’t the answer.
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4. You’re Hung Up on An Ex
Be honest with yourself: are you still hung up on a past relationship? If so, it doesn’t make any sense to move forward with your current one.
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5. Codependency
Your partner should be there through thick and thin, but they aren’t there to solve every problem. If you excessively rely on them for emotional fulfillment or decision-making then you may not be ready for marriage. Codependency can easily lead to resentment down the road.
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6. You’re Being Selfish
If you consistently put your needs ahead of your partner, marriage isn’t the next step for you. A relationship is give and take, a partnership built on equality, empathy, and consideration. If you’re not willing to give that to your partner, you shouldn’t be getting married.
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7. You Argue All the Time
The occasional tiff is normal in any relationship, but if you constantly argue with a partner, there may be serious issues. Don’t jump into a marriage if you always butt heads with your potential life partner.
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8. You Haven’t Known Each Other Long
Building a solid foundation beforehand is a keystone move to readying yourself for marriage. That means making it past the infatuation stage, living together, and legitimately getting to know someone before you commit to them forever.
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9. You Feel Pressured
Just because your friends are getting married doesn’t mean you have to follow suit. Only take the plunge when you’re ready for that kind of commitment, otherwise you’re looking at heartache down the line.
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10. You Want Your Partner to Change
Wanting what’s best for your partner is normal. So is challenging them to do things outside of their comfort zone or encouraging them to be the best version of themselves. On the other hand, if you want them to change into someone else entirely, you’re more in love with the idea of them, not the actual them.