Some people just need the spotlight all the time. It doesn't matter if it's love or hostility, they just need a reaction. Sometimes they are the ones who will never shut-up, and sometimes they are lunatics that cry wolf one too many times before it really bites them in the rear. Maybe we even have some stories of a time we went a little too far trying to entertain our friends or family.
Below are some of the funniest, cringe-filled stories about those folks who just need too much attention. Take a look through and make sure none of these stories sound too familiar or hit too close to home.
45. Not the best man
At my wedding. A friend got hammered early and overtook the microphone during the best man/maid of honor speeches. He brought up all his friends (wife knows him better) to make speeches even though they has nothing planned. My wedding DVD now has about 30 minutes of cringeworthy, uncomfortable speeches thanks to him.
Later that night he stole a bottle of JD from the bartender and hid it under a table before he passed out.
44. No loyalty
The dude was my best friend since kindergarten, now I can't wait until he leaves at the end of the year. On the first few days of school this year, we were outside for sports and we could whatever we wanted since we just did a test and finished early.
I decided to go throw the Frisbee with some friends and the guy I mentioned stayed back towards the car park with some other people.
At some point a started seeing rocks appearing, and I turn around to see him throwing rocks at me. None hit, but one almost grazed my ear. This dude plays high level cricket and is a hard thrower, so if they had hit I'd be done for.
43. Not cool dude
In 9th grade English, we had a potluck and I had my mom make some bomb rice pudding. Because of a late notice she ended up staying up late to finish making it. Some rice stuck to the bottom of the pot while my mom was cooking it and turned brown, this jerk in my class who was extremely loud and arrogant yelled that there was a bandaid in the pudding.
I ended up having to take practically all of it back home to sadden my mom. 5 years later and I’m still mad over it.
Pixabay
42. Not a pencil
One kid in my class sharpened his fingers in the electric sharpener.
He was sent home after the nurse treated his wounds.
Flickr
41. He's a goner
One student stole the key to the school auditorium. Once there, he peed on all over the place. when the principal's daughter accidentally saw it and tried to stop it, he hit her and broke several of her ribs.
Unknown
40. Breakdown
Someone who really needed attention at our school undressed in front of the class.
Shame he got fired, he was a great teacher.
39. "Eat it!"
We were all sitting in a circle in Spanish class, talking about prom in plain old English for some reason. Boring! A centipede appeared and had the misfortune to be near my desk. Ya see, *I* was that kid back then. A bunch of the other boys started chanting, "Eat it! Eat it! Eat it!" So I ate it. Got me kicked clean out of the class.
38. Breaking in
My little brother is a few years younger than me. He used to come into my room to harass me all the time and my parents never allowed me to have a lock. He was around 10 when I started propping a piano stand under my doorknob to keep people out.
So, little brother pushed the door and the piano stand was at the knob. I ignored it before all I heard was the loudest BANG followed by a thud. I opened the door to see him laying on the floor, holding his face, and crying. Apparently, he decided that he could break down my door like in the movies by throwing himself against it after running from down the hall. But, this kid didn't just throw his shoulder or kick it.
He threw his entire body against it like a squirrel going for a tree. Arms and legs out, face first. I got blamed for it but it was worth it.
Only time I ever laughed that hard at his expense again was when he tried to fart into my room and pooed himself about 2 years later.
37. No smoking
I used to work at a call center and there was a really annoying and attention-starved girl. Now this was a massive call center with like 15 floors, all different departments taking calls and making cold calls. She worked on a different floor but she was notorious.
Well one time I'm on the elevator and she's there. Some dude gets on and he smells like smoke. She says (to no one), "If one more person gets on the elevator and smells like smoke, I'm gonna SCREAM". Me and the other dude just totally ignored her because we know engaging her in any way would only escalate the situation.
Sure enough another fella gets on the elevator and he smells like smoke. She took in a powerful SNIFFFFFFF and then SCREAMED at the top of her lungs before the doors even closed. The elevator had very reflective acoustics (fancy glassed surfaces) and it felt like someone stabbed me in the ear.
Anyway the people on that last floor filed a complaint because that scream scared customers that they were trying to sell, a few people said they lost sales because of it.
She got fired. Finally
36. Earning trust
There was this girl for a while that had this huge crush on me, and she didn't seem to realize that she had been a total jerk to me for most of my life and that I really disliked her. Finally she decided to "get my attention" by stealing my $300 leather jacket and saying that she wouldn't give it back unless I went out with her. So I contacted her mom and told her that if she didn't intervene, then my parents were going to press charges.
The day after she gave my jacket back, she sent me this long-winded text talking about how "I hurt her so badly, and it would take a long time to earn back her trust."
I replied with by saying "I don't want you to trust me, I want you to leave me alone."
Pixabay
35. The real Cartman
In my early grade school years (about K-4th grade) there was this kid named Jason. Funny thing, Jason was almost literally Cartman years before South Park even existed (angry fat kid spoiled by a clueless single mom). Jason was always doing things for attention, and one time we went on a class trip to this 18th century fortress.
Well, he decided to stick his head in one of the big cannons out front and his fat head got stuck.
As you can imagine, he had a pretty epic claustrophobia freak out in the time it took for them to get him out of there.
Pixabay
34. Beating the new kid
We had a foreign exchange student from Japan that had epilepsy. She got a lot of attention because a)she was a cute Japanese girl and b) she had a pretty cool personality and was super smart.
The "I crave attention kid" was apparently jealous and suddenly "developed" a super rare brain disorder that made her "fall asleep randomly" and "see monsters and ghosts". She would "pass out" in the hallways and in class. She would say the "demons" were distracting her from the lessons and ask to be excused to the restroom to gather herself, then "pass out" in the bathroom for the rest of that period. She was caught by a teacher once and was put on the watch list for bad behavior.
She even had the gall to accuse the Japanese girl of faking her illness DURING AN EPILEPTIC EPISODE!
33. New name
I remember when Pinch-a-Loaf earned her nickname. She was this loud, obnoxious 14-year-old that was trying to hang with the older kids. I was at this party full of the most the grade 11's and 12's at my high school and she decides to show up and include herself.
She didn't even bring her own booze. She gets told to get out and in protest, she squats down and drops a deuce on the kitchen floor.
From that day on, she was Pinch-a-Loaf.
Photo by Michael Discenza on Unsplash
32. Ruining it for everyone
A kid jumped into the harbor fully clothed on a class trip that was the tradition for the junior class at my school.
We were the last class allowed to take the trip.
31. Spicy
A kid in my class drank an entire bottle of habenero sauce at lunch and pooed his pants in history class.
30. The last straw
There was a guy in high school that was always messing with me because he knew I wouldn't respond. Well one day he went too far and actually put his hands on me, shoving me over.
The problem (for him) was that we were in masonry class and he had knocked over the project I was building. And there were lots of bricks and hammers and such lying about. So I grabbed a brick from my now-destroyed project and came at him. He ran to the teacher like a chicken and told on me.
The teacher saw the whole thing, so I was fine.
I still wonder if I really would've hit him with that brick if he'd stuck around. I hope not.
29. K-9s
One time this girl brought a vape pen, weed, and vodka to school. Keep this in mind, it was skunk grass. She thought that the BEST WAY to hide it was by putting it in a black sock and drenching it with Axe body spray, let’s just say....... the cops were at the school by the end of 2nd hour.
28. Oldest gag
I’m a choir teacher and “that kid” in my class decided that when I told the class to sit down after warm-ups it would be really funny to pull the chair out from under the kid standing in front of him.
Long story short, kid fell, pinched a nerve in his elbow, and the marching band lost one of their 3 snare drummers.
“I crave attention” kid got sent to the office.
27. A real Grinch
My favorite cousin has three kids and her oldest is an absolute drama queen. For several years she was an only child and everyone considered her the golden child. Then she got a brother and sister and she stopped being the center of attention and it was killing her. So Christmas rolls around the year her youngest sibling was born. The baby was adorable and everyone fell in love with her.
Well, the oldest couldn't handle it and she pushed the Christmas tree over, which shattered several of our grandmother's very expensive ornaments. Grandma had a special way she did the tree. She'd put all of the expensive and rare or old ornaments up at the top where the little kids couldn't reach and then the bottom of the tree would be the cheap plastic ornaments and paper chains, popcorn chains and cranberries on a string.
The tree ended up knocking several photos off the wall, crushed a couple of presents, landed on great grandma who was asleep in the arm chair in the corner. She had tiny vertical cuts on her cheeks that never fully healed. To add insult to literal injury the kid started jumping on the presents.
She literally destroyed Christmas.
Unknown
28. Joy ride
In my high school, they have security on school grounds either walking around or driving in golf carts. In my sophomore year of high school, this one senior stole one of the security's golf cart. He drove around campus for a good 4-5 minutes with students running after him while recording and screaming.
The senior stopped driving and went into the office where security caught up to him. He eventually was sent to juvie and did not graduate. This all happened during April so he only had about 2 months left.
27. Wake up call
So I was in high school and this particular day I’d fallen asleep in class (my teachers were awesome about this if you were a student who normally didn’t sleep in class).
While in my happy state of sleep, I woke up to a very loud thud and a ton of pain in the back of my head and some pain on my nose.
Turned out the class clown decided to bash me in the back of the head with a textbook while I was asleep, all for the attention.
Of course, when we got to the principal the waterworks came. I hope he pays for it one day...
Unknown
26. War hero
He told the friend circle that his brother's plane crashed while in active duty. I held him while he cried.
I met his brother again a couple years later.
Unfortunately, I, being so timid, just let it go.
25. Pyro
A kid at my school stuffed a bunch of toilet paper into a toilet and set it on fire, cause a massive incident and almost burnt down a building.
Caused the rest of us to have to sit in 30 degree heat for an hour while it was being put out. Only ended up getting suspended and forced to pay damages.
24. Competitive
When the already really busty girl in my school felt threatened by the other girls starting to get boobs and put water balloons down her shirt on the 1st day of 6th grade.
One of them popped. There was a lot of crying and screaming on her part.
22. Scary situation
A kid started yelling and screaming purely in an annoying and antagonistic way during a school shooting drill. We had no idea it was a drill and the kid is just banging on walls and yelling "HEY WE'RE IN HERE WE'RE IN HERE!!!" as other students are in the corner and girls are crying because they truly believe this kid is going to get them killed.
The teacher and student aids were trying to restrain him and a friend of mine (again, still under the impression this was real) literally stood up to go punch his lights out to shut him up just as the drill ended, and it was revealed to be just a drill.
Had the announcement come a few seconds later that kid would have gotten knocked out.
21. Taken
Well this is from my Freshman year of high school. So that year, many of the Senior pranks were the usually generic things (toilet paper), the works. So this girl had this great idea for a prank and to be a standout...faking her own kidnapping. Shortly after school one day in late May she called/texted her parents, and friends that were out of the loop, hysterically telling them that a stranger shoved her in a truck and drove off.
She said, 'she was scared' and 'please help her!". The parents and friends wasted no time and immediately notified police, eventually the Amber Alert was issued. She was later tracked down and found that evening. Turns out she was at the next city over hanging out at her best friend's house. She confessed and was promptly arrested.
20. X-men
Some wolverine wanna be stabbed me with six pencils.
19. Water fight
Had a kid in elementary school named Ricky. He was the typical jerk kid that just WAS in trouble constantly... he was funny in some cases but in general it was like "PLEASE BE QUIET" whenever he spoke up.
One afternoon pretty much everyone was ignoring Ricky and he got upset and excused himself to use the bathroom. About 20 minutes passed and the teacher asked if another student would go check on him. THEN, that student was gone a for a long time.
So everything stopped, and they called the office. Turns out Ricky was in the bathroom lobbing dirty cups of water and whatever else you can imagine at people then holding the door sh.
He had like 4-5 other children in there just covered in disgusting water.
I hated that kid.
18. Bus tales
There was a kid on our school bus who needed way too much attention. He was constantly screaming or throwing stuff out the window. He at one point reenacted giving birth the whole ride. Complete with legs spread, screaming fake pushing etc. One day he threw a water bottle and hit a car. He was banned from the bus for the year. The next year he was allowed back on. In the first week he pulled out a needle and pierced his lower lip while on the bus. Of course it was bumpy so he didn’t get it centered so he did it again to even it out. He was banned from the bus again.
17. Pirate takeover
A student at my school lowered the U.S. flag on the school's flagpole and hoisted up his Jolly Roger <pirate> flag in its place.
16. 420
A student at my school pulled out a joint and started smoking it IN CLASS. I should add that we went to CONVENT SCHOOL. The nuns were appalled. We then had an assembly where they spoke about the devil and green, and we all had to go to the chapel and pray.
I believe the girl was expelled. I miss those crazy secondary school days.
15. Extreme changes
A girl at my school put some vodka into a water bottle, brought the bottle to school, and passed it around to other kids throughout the day.
The result of this? Water bottles - and all other beverages, were not allowed in the school except during breakfast and lunch. On top of that, the bottle couldn’t have been opened at any time earlier in the day. You had to open it at lunch if you wanted it for lunch, or at breakfast if you wanted it at breakfast.
That is, as long as the vice principal inspected it to make sure that it was still sealed closed and not tampered with when you got to school, and they had to sign it so other teachers knew it was allowed.
14. Lucky kid
A kid at my school ran super fast down the hallway with his eyes closed clipping his neck on the corner of the locker and opened a huge gash. Our school was just down the street from the fire station so the ambulance got there pretty fast.
They were able to save him because it was mainly just a flesh wound, but he lost a dangerous amount of blood and was in a coma for 2 days.
13. Hey, it's $20
We had a guy at work who took $20 to eat a live frog.
Then he was out sick for a week.
12. Anything to win
Told the school she had leukemia to get sympathy votes for class president. She did not have leukemia.
11. Sore loser
He was a competitor of a robotics competition. He lost cause he had never programmed before and had created a crappy one just 10 minutes before the event. After he lost, he grabbed his chest and fake a heart attack and scared the heck out of the whole staff.
He was suspended afterwards.
Unknown
10. The cooler way
A guy in my 6th form found himself locked in his own house (his parents had both left for work and he had slept in). He was on his final warning for not attending classes (this was 6th form in an open school so it was your own decision whether to attend classes and he bunked most of them). Desperate to attend class so he didn’t get dropped, he jumped from his bedroom window on the upper floor and promptly broke both his knees and a leg. He was lying on his driveway for half an hour before a neighbor found him and called an ambulance.
When we asked him why not climb out of a ground floor window (which he was perfectly able to do). He insisted it would sound cooler if he jumped and combat-rolled down to impress a girl he fancied.
He was in a wheelchair for 2 months and failed to get the girl.
9. Not a top student
A kid in my old school tried to be funny by stealing dangerous chemicals from the lab storeroom and putting it in his pocket.
It ended up catching fire and giving him severe third degree burns across his leg.
8. New toy
I got a text one Tuesday night saying, "My taser just came in LOL." Ten minutes later I get a text saying "Accidentally tased my grandma, what do I do?"
I figured he was joking about both, or at least lying for kicks and giggles. Next day during research workshop (our middle school's version of study hall) he says, "Hey guys, check this out!" and whips out from his backpack a purple stun gun. About 6 inches long, ends looked sharp enough to maim without the risk of electric shock.
I kinda whisper/shout at him, "hey dude what the HECK are you doing?" Listen I've done some attention-seeking stuff but this is a bit too far. He puts it back and is just giggling the whole day. Yikes. Next day, he's called down to the principal's office -- by the police. Turns out he had not only the stun gun, but also an army knife in his backpack.
Didn't hear from him for twelve weeks. When he came back, he was allowed a clear plastic bag for his books. Since I was a witness, I had to make a statement down at the police station. Not a fun way to spend a spring day.
And yes. He did actually tase his grandma. She was unharmed, from what I heard.
Wonder what stun-gun kid is doing now.
7. He warned you
A while back my mom's friend visited, (I was 10 or 11 at the time) and brought along her kids. I was having a blast, and I had brought my DS along to my grandma's house. So I'm having a grand old time showing the other kids Pokemon White 2, mainly showing off my level 100 bug thing (the purple bug, I forgot what it was called.).
So then my little brother Allen comes along and asks me to play, I say no. He does this again and again until he finally says in his annoying little 5 year old voice "IF YOU DON'T PLAY WITH ME I'M GOING TO PEE ON YOU!" I chuckle a little bit and shoo him away, you can probably guess where this is going.
So after showing off my bugs stats, I feel something warm running down my back. I turn around... AND THIS LITTLE KID HAS HIS THING OUT, PEEING ON MY BACK! I jump up screech "MOOOOOMM!!!!!!" And she comes running around the side of the house, and Allen is still running after me trying get me more! Laughing with a big grin the entire time.
I run behind my mom and she is LIVID. She marches him inside by the ear, and after a few seconds we hear a loud WHAP! followed by crying, after a couple more smacks mom comes back out of the house and gets me a new shirt, and puts dirty shirt in the washer. I go back to whatever I was doing and eventually, Allen comes out with puffy red eyes and tear steaks down his face, "Sorry..." He mumbles looking down at his feet.
I tell him it's okay and that was that. I don't remember much else, but I do remember my mom telling grandma about how she got the wooden spoon and made him go bare butt... Those were the worst whippings.
6. Flaming chariot
So you know those big industrial bins on wheels that you find at blocks of flats or other places?
My school had those. They were loose. The lids also weren't fastened down so you could open them. One day the dinner staff had been clearing out a load of cardboard boxes and stuff from deliveries.
The kid decided to do two things.
-
Start a fire in the bin using the cardboard.
-
Climb on the bin and ride it (while it's on fire) down the fairly gentle sloping road in front of the school.
The fact he didn't get burned was a miracle as it turns out those plastic lids on the bins melt quite easily. And he was riding the bin as it melted through.
5. Future Steve-o
One kid mixed booze into his bottle of Dr. Pepper, got wasted during auto shop class, asked another kid to punch him in the face, kid obliged and knocked him out.
Got kicked out of school, and ended up getting the auto shop teacher fired. Because I guess the teacher was supposed to magically know what that kid was doing.
4. Magical moment
I was a camp counselor and out on a retreat (we camped a few days in the mountains away from the camp). We were all settled down a little before pitch black night time rolls in. Me, the other adult counselor, and 10 kids aged 10-ish are just kicking it when one of the kid goes wide eyed and silently points at something behind my back.
A deer has wandered up to us and is just standing there five feet away, just looking at us. It was freaking magical. I could hear her breathing and I made eye contact with her. Time stood still and we were all entranced. This was a camp about appreciating nature so all the kids were as impressed as if like Mickey Mouse and Batman had shown up.
We all stood in perfect silence for five seconds appreciating the rarity of the moment. Kids standing still with the firewood bundles in their arms, one kid halfway bent to the ground to pick up a bag of marshmallows, one kid kneeling still where he had been tying his shoes.
I hear one kid behind me sigh exasperatedly and jump to his feet and my blood beings to boil because I know who it is and I know he is going to ruin this, on purpose, because everyone is focused on something that isn’t him. He hits the deer in the head with a rock and everyone goes nuts yelling at him, which makes him HAPPY, he is grinning ear to ear and dancing and laughing like a mad man because their attention was all he wanted.
“It’s just a stupid deer it’s not like you’ve never seen a deer before besides no one was going to listen to my stories with a stupid deer around.”
I looked at the other counselor and we were both thinking the exact same thing.
3. Angry goat
This kid I knew was a jerk. I had a couple of pet goats and he would come over and bully them all the time. He'd poke them through the fence with sticks, throw rocks at them, spook them with loud noises...but he'd never go INTO the pen. He was too scared of them. He should have known better. He was 16.
One day we're all inside and we hear this blood curdling scream. In comes the kid, screaming at the top of his lungs.
'The goat! The goat is after me! Help!'
We turn to see the big billy goat staring at him through the sliding glass door. Every once in a while it'd headbutt the glass. Now this was a VERY docile animal. He'd have never hurt a fly...but he was out for that boy's blood.
It turns out that the kid had been torturing the goat. He had him pinned up against the wall of the pen throwing rocks and sticks at its animal parts to see if he could hit them.
The goat came after him, scaled the fence, and chased him across three acres of land and into the house.
The kid waited for two hours for the goat to go away, but it never did. Any time he opened a door to try to sneak away, the goat was right there trying to attack him.
Eventually the goat disappeared and the kid tried to sneak out a window feet first...and once again started screaming, because the goat was RIGHT THERE head butting his backside as he climbed out.
It was absolutely liberating.
2. Show and tell
A girl I knew brought a snake to school in her bra. Like a full-sized pet one. That’s right, in her bra. I am still not sure how nobody noticed movement in her shirt. She took it out at lunch and the biology teachers confiscated it and gave it back to her at the end of the day.
She told them her mom was gonna take it away so she wanted to keep it safe. Then three hours later she tells everyone on Facebook that her mom wasn’t really going to take it away, it was a “social experiment”.
1. Candied apple
My friend and I were at a high school track meet with other peers. One guy finishes his run, comes over to the stands where we were all sitting and sits a minute then vomits a spray containing apple chunks he had ate sometime earlier. My buddy being the crowd pleaser he is gives into the double dog dares and proceeds to take his keys out of his pocket, stab a chunk of apple and pop it into his mouth even chewing and swallowing.
Needless to say he wasn’t real popular with getting the girls but everyone loved to party with that clown.
_at_Magdalen_fjord,_Svalbard_(1).jpg){kind=link}
