Friendship Is a Two-Way Street
Adults hope to ditch bad friends in high school—no one wants to deal with constant drama or radio silence in their 40s. Yet, certain behaviors linger like bad smells and people can’t seem to shake their tardiness or jealousy. With that, here are 20 signs of poor friendship.
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1. Mean-Spirited
It’s one thing to lightly jab each other, but persistent comments or mean-spirited “jokes” make others feel terrible. If the only way you can be funny is by putting others down, they won’t be friends much longer.
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2. Jealous of Success
It’s only human to feel the odd pang of jealousy, but true friends don’t take others’ success as their failures. There’s no need to compete or get passive-aggressive if your friend just scored a promotion.
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3. Chronic Gossiping
Listen, we all like a good gossip session—the major difference is whether you’re gossiping about celebrities or each other. Spilling secrets or trash talking so-called friends behind their backs is villain behavior.
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4. Planning to Cancel Hangouts
No one knows what the future holds, but it’s just plain rude to schedule cancellations. There’s no point in agreeing to hangouts if you already have plans to cancel them. Be honest. It’s okay to bail for some alone time.
5. Never Asking About Them
Venting to your friends is much different than ignoring their problems. If you never ask about their lives, don’t be surprised if they assume the worst. Friendship is a two-way street and that includes showing an interest.
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6. Always Showing Up Late
There’s really no excuse for chronic tardiness. It’s fine to miss the bus or get stuck in traffic, but it’s an inconsiderate habit. If you know you’re the type to run late, get ready earlier to ensure you make it.
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7. Everything’s Drama
Drama follows some people wherever they go, and it gets old quick. From bad relationships to constant work problems, friends won’t want to hang out if a girls’ night degenerates into negativity—especially when it’s every time. 
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8. Never Reaching Out
We all get busy, but making the time is what separates acquaintances from true friends. If one of you always sits around for the other, the friendship won’t go far.
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9. Judgemental Behavior
Real friends call out questionable behavior—bad friends call out everything. Whether it’s what someone wears or who someone’s dating, consistent criticism drives people away.
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10. You’re Clingy
Everyone needs downtime, including your friends. It’s unfair to expect people to rearrange their schedules or always be available. Friends aren’t therapists either, so dumping problem after problem is bound to get exhausting.
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11. Only Available When Single
Don’t assume friends are blind to the fact that you’re only available when you’re single. They notice and they won’t appreciate feeling like second best, especially if you’re close.
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12. Not Showing Up
Weddings, funerals, a child’s first birthday—it’s important to show up. Of course, it’s impossible to attend every event, but making the effort is what counts. Skipping milestones sends the wrong message to those we care about.
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13. Ignoring Opinions
There’s a difference between wanting advice and wanting someone to agree with you. Good friends look out for you, so even if you don’t want to hear the truth, don’t snub their advice either.
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14. They Don’t Come to You
A subtle sign is whether or not friends approach you. Sure, you may turn to them with problems, but do they comfortable turning to you? While not everyone wants to discuss everything, friends should feel good about confiding in you.
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15. You Try to One-Up People
Oh, a friend just finished a book? Yeah, well, you read it already. You’re pretty sure you know the guy who wrote it, too. Friends don’t want to deal with frequent one-upmanship. It’s okay to let someone else have their moment.
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16. You Don’t Pay Attention
Friends take note when you don’t pay attention. They may feel hurt to see you on your phone at dinner or noticeably bored with their stories. Real friends pay attention, ask questions, and genuinely care.
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17. Disrespecting Boundaries
Even if you don’t agree with them, boundaries are boundaries. Friends don’t overstep or judge others for their lines in the sand. After all, you’d be pretty peeved if someone disrespected your comfort zones.
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18. Holding Grudges
A big part of any relationship is working through arguments. Honest communication and mature discussions pave the way for healthy friendships. Holding onto grudges only leads to resentment and burned bridges.
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19. Expecting Their Money
From never having your wallet to MLM scams, friends aren’t a piggy bank. You wouldn’t want to always spring for drinks or pay for movie tickets—don’t expect it from others.
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20. Can’t Keep Friendships
Making friends isn’t as hard as keeping them. Sometimes, we organically lose friends along the way, but other times boil down to rude behaviors. If you find you have a hard time holding onto friends, it might be time to look inward.
